The Peace & Power of a Positive Perspective



Does that number bring some special meaning to mind?  Maybe the number of Girl Scout cookies you ordered?  (Or ate over the weekend?  Egads!)  Perhaps it’s the number of wins an NBA Eastern Division team will need to make the playoffs?

Back in 2011, Jodi Sawyer, RN posted this little ditty for women on the Dr. Oz website;

 “Making 40 the new 30”

Maybe you’re turning the big 4 – 0 this year?  Maybe 2013 is your 40th high school or college reunion year?

Round numbers like 40 tend to stand out, yes?  And that’s true for me, too.  You see tomorrow is my 40th wedding anniversary.  40!  Egads!

I’ve written about my wife frequently.  It’s one of those fact-greater-than-fiction tales; high school sweethearts; eloped (she was still a teenager, Egads!); raised a family; going strong 40 years later.  Now, I know why I’m still married to her; but why she’s kept me around – well that’s quite the puzzlement.

Oh, we’ve had our ups and downs.  But here’s a little known fact:  she has never, ever, even once, raised her voice to me.  Much as I have given her good reason… Egads!  Really; never.  I on the other hand, can not count avoidance of voice-raising as one of my “features”.  I’m still trying to learn life’s key lessons from our favorite, Unknown Sage:

Pratter’s Prayer 

Lord, make my words as sweet as honey, for tomorrow I may have to eat them.

I do think we communicate well.  That feature seems to be working.  Maybe I somehow mastered Harlan Miller’s advice:

Often the difference between a successful marriage and a mediocre one consists of leaving three or four things a day unsaid.

Over the years like so many couples we have changed our residence; changed our lifestyles; changed our interests.  Maybe it’s been her discovery of the enjoyment from horses that has helped her keep me around?

My husband said if I don’t sell my horses, he will leave me.  Some days I miss him.

Unknown Sage


She comes from a family of long-lasting marriages.  I knew her parents and her maternal grandparents well.  Her sisters have long and successful marriages going on; my brother, too.  My Mom and Dad would likely have enjoyed a long-lasting marriage if not for the cancer that took my Mom’s life when she was just 56.

Difficult one might ask?  Maybe.  But I’m not sure when in a relationship what the relationship is between difficulty and longevity.  Here’s one point of view:

The difficult we do immediately.  The impossible takes a little longer.

U.S. Army Corps of Engineers

Many of you are in a long-lasting relationship, too; many have been married longer than we.  When you find that special person, it’s not difficult is it?  No, I don’t consider maintaining a lasting relationship to be difficult.  (My wife’s point of view on the other hand?  Just kidding – I hope!).

Life is difficult.  This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths.  It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it.  Once we know that life is difficult – then life is no longer difficult.  Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.

M. Scott Peck 

So I suppose the thing that matters most is simple and obvious:

Love is a rock against the wind.

Etheridge Knight 

Happy 40th Anniversary Dear.  I love you.


Did you like this little ditty?  You might enjoy my website and book, too:  The Peace & Power of a Positive Perspective© Please check it out.



  1. Your loving wife
    Mar 18, 2013

    You are the love of my life, my best friend, my supporter, and alwaysl my high school sweet heart.
    Love you.

  2. Bill Foss
    Mar 18, 2013

    Happy Anniversary to you both! Your wife must really love those horses, Gary.

    • Gary
      Mar 22, 2013

      Thanks coach! Yes, and she still has a little room for me. 🙂 Thx, GAP

  3. Sean Hart
    Mar 18, 2013

    40 years is truly inspirational. God bless you both.

    • Gary
      Mar 22, 2013

      Thanks Sean! It’s gone fast for sure. Thx, GAP

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